My friend Monika took me up on the "just ask" part of my profile and wants to know what makes me the happiest after all of my life experiences.
OK, here goes: I'm a romantic; I LOVE my friends and family and get more joy than almost anything when I'm just with them, no agenda, just enjoying each other. As you'll see I said "almost anything" because other than just being with my friends and family there is one thing that makes me the most happy: I am addicted to love! I'm addicted in a way that is almost hard to describe. People often wonder and ask why I've never been married. I used to say it was because I've never found the right woman, but I've come to know that this isn't true. I may have found the right woman many times over...I certainly did find her 4 years ago. But even in the story of that love, which went wrong there are parts of my true happiness. I simply don't understand how love ends. How someone can love you and then a day later, or a week later or a month later or 10 years later, after knowing all there is to know about you, decide that you aren't a good person, decide that their love and affection was misplaced. I know, events happen and sometimes people do things that are seemingly unforgivable. But those events seem so few and far between to me. Not as frequent as we'd make then in today's world. I know I'm rambling right now but the fact is I don't think most people understand the meaning of the word LOVE. "I love you but not if you spend too much money."..."I love you but not if you've ever been with another woman."... "I love you, but I just can't be with you"..."I love you but this person is better for me."..."I'll always love you but goodbye."...too me most people have no clue what love really means. I think I do...and maybe I'm wrong. I love beauty, friends, family, and I love the idea of love and it makes me happy. I just wonder if I'll ever meet anyone who understands it the way I do? I think you meet people and you have a connection with them and if that connection turns into or equals love, you can't just throw that person aside for someone who makes more money or who seems more "stable" or who "understands" you better. All the details are bullshit if you have real love!!! They'll happen or they won't but real love transcends the day-to-day. It drives a stake in your heart and pulls you to that person. even when you know it's wrong you can't help yourself.
Anyway, this sounds more like what makes me unhappy....My life is about beauty, knowledge, loyalty, friendship, family and Love!
That's for you Monika!!
Your latest post reminded me of something I think Marcel Proust once said (wrote) "that the kindest words of love come from those who are leaving" How sad - good thing you pulled out of it at the end!
ReplyDeletePolo
Call me when you can...
ReplyDeleteWow! That is Deep and I love what you said. I know that a connection you have with someone special is deeper than one knows...it is so real and the passion is beyond words. Real Love never fades..its always there. People use I Love You so casual that when you say it to that person you Love, you are saying it to them, with expressioin and touch. They feel you. They get it. It is a happiness that fullfills the voids we challenge at times. Love does have meaning..and that is beautiful.
ReplyDeleteMonika